Bryce and I had a fight today; not a guys busting knuckles on each other, but like a couple fight. I mentioned to him that i was having some doubts as to what we were doing, and thought maybe we should take it slower, at least till i feel better about things.
And that's when he started getting mad. He acted like i was getting in the way of what he wanted; i started crying and then pointed out that we were doing this so i could be Quinn, not so he could play with my head and create his dream girl. We yelled at each other, and i stormed off, crying like a little girl. I even started to throw away all my girl stuff (or return the borrowed stuff to my sister), and delete all my files, when Bryce knocked on my door. He said he was sorry that he was so mean. He was so amazed by our progress that he was getting excited, and couldn't wait for the next steps to start.
In the end, he told me that whatever i decided would be ok with him, but he hoped I chose to go ahead.
And, after alot of thinking and crying, and really wishing i could wear my sister's bikini, i agreed. He left me a new file, and it's really cool. It's alot like that 'dream girl' one we used earlier, but in this one, you do sorta a 'daydream'; i just used it again before i logged on. I was sorta sitting there, staring into space, but in my head, i was a real girl doing girly things in my girly room! I mean it was weird; i was setting out a cute dress to wear to church tomorrow, setting my alarm, txting to Bryce, changing into my nighty and cuddling up with a teddy bear daddy bought me. But in actuality, i never got up, and only 15 minutes passed! I might even try it again; just let my mind wander a bit. Maybe i'll think about Bryce before doing it, or maybe imagine going to church as a pretty girl!
ok, hope to write more soon!
Saturday, July 12, 2008
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